When Smoke Gets In Your Eyes

'Niceness as a scalpel'

2012-01-28T01:23:00.001-08:00

But ja, maybe he isn't neh. "Nothing special about this." Circles.

2012-01-27T04:07:00.000-08:00

2012-01-27T03:38:00.000-08:00

He is an Indigo Child
His combination of light energies is said to be perfection
But don't be fooled when he turns in your direction
The warmth in his illumination is not caused by your friction
It's a mirror of his hue transfixing you
He is an Indigo Child
There is no time or space for comparison
Turn within.

2012-01-24T05:41:00.000-08:00

Nothing quite like letting go of a want.

[Big fucking smily face.]

Finding new highs

2012-01-23T05:14:00.001-08:00

2012-01-19T05:05:00.000-08:00

Speaking lyrics. Feeling beatings. Losing control.

2012-01-15T23:58:00.001-08:00

Feel the sun resonate from my skin
Taste the salt on my lips
Be the wind through my hair

2012-01-13T02:15:00.005-08:00

2012-01-12T02:16:00.000-08:00

I spoke to her.

RAISED MY HANDS.

Smiled.

And asked her to bless me with her grace and light.

She heard me.

2012-01-11T00:41:00.000-08:00

Struggling to find my centre
Tossing sheets, pillows, dreams
Thirsty for the next step -
but not sure which rock is stable enough to take my
weight
Weighing up options...
Losing time
Losing what I need to find

Joh. Now that is wack.

2012-01-05T23:17:00.000-08:00

I'm suppose to be on a laptop sabatical

2011-12-29T10:07:00.000-08:00

But as you can tell, that didn't work out. I need to mantra this shit out!

My Zambian tune

2011-11-23T12:09:00.000-08:00

Murmuration

2011-11-07T05:08:00.001-08:00

Murmuration from Sophie Windsor Clive on Vimeo.

I've been away...

2011-11-04T09:15:00.000-07:00

Chasing Jacaranda shadows in Zambia. My mission? To find the maker. I'll be venturing through the nine provinces until November 2012. Find out what I accomplish on my missions here.

Hearts aren't made for boxes. So what the fuck is your's doing in one?

2011-09-27T01:54:00.000-07:00

Japanese cloisonné

2011-09-27T00:58:00.000-07:00

The painstaking intricacy. Who wouldn't see the beauty in it?

While I was at the Valley's home, for my friend Greer's birthday (Greer and her love make amazing bags btw), I discovered a beautiful set of vases.

Thin copper wire moulded out a pattern, filled in between with enamel paste (sometimes even gemstones or glass). Japanese cloisonné.

I can feel another collection-obsession coming on...

Hans Borres

2011-09-19T08:17:00.000-07:00

His images are amazing. His eye for detail and capturing moments. Pure perfection.

And well, we all already know how much I love Japan...

I found him while Googling Rilakkuma. Yay for distractions!

'the dance' - by Toni Stuart

2011-09-19T03:15:00.000-07:00

it is a battle for ground

between you and I

a dance in 2/4 time
on a chequered board:

heel toe,

arm hand,

hand shoulder

toe toe

pirouette out

i dared

to speak the

truth

: not bury it in

tango with

you, our hips square

never touching, your

hand on small of my

back, a r c h e d

my head turned away from

you

so close…

it is a battle for ground

between you and I

a dance in ¾ time

a waltz with shoulders square

frame never broken

eyes askance always

we dare not

look

i dared

to meet your

stare

as we spun

across

a sprung

wood

floor

:a lingering look

questioned the pain

you couldn’t

touch

till shivering hands

let go of your

body, for fear they would love

your pain too

much

it is a battle for ground

between you and i

a dance in 4/4 time

breath

brushes bare

shoulder, your palm in small of back

you guide a

spin

and with eyes

closed, i find my way

back

still, i dared

to pull our unspoken
words into

the burning
light of a myriad mirror ball

r e f l e c t i o n s

falling

your

face,

hands and

neck. and everywhere

your

feet rose and

fell, they were

met by the fear you

could not name

daylight

it is only

a battle for ground

between

you

and

but one of us

always dies

©Toni Stuart, Cape Town 2009 -2011

2011-09-14T00:28:00.000-07:00

verb (used with object)

1. to pursue in order to seize, overtake, etc.: The police officer chased the thief.

2. to pursue with intent to capture or kill, as game; hunt: to chase deer.

3. to follow or devote one's attention to with the hope of attracting, winning, gaining, etc.: He chased her for three years before she consented to marry him.

4. to drive or expel by force, threat, or harassment: She chased the cat out of the room.

verb (used without object)

5. to follow in pursuit: to chase after someone.

6. to rush or hasten: We spent the weekend chasing around from one store to another.

I think I may be running round in circles...

I'm done.

Want me? Well then come and get me.

It's always better to look out the window

2011-09-14T00:21:00.000-07:00

London Bus Tour from moritz oberholzer on Vimeo.

Afrikaaps

2011-09-11T03:57:00.000-07:00

Knowing your past, your origin
Owning who you are
Starting the Afrikaaps revolution

AFRIKAAPS (The Documentary) Trailer from Dylan Valley on Vimeo.

Feel that beat

2011-09-10T08:30:00.000-07:00

Last night I saw Kesivan and the Lights, Chico Ceaser and Thandiswa Mazwai perform, and fuck it, they were good.

Sitting in Cape Town City Hall listening to African musicians; a place filled with aching history - where 21 years ago Nelson Mandela hung over the balcony and said, "Never again, I say never again..." - the heart breaths, it breaths.

They took me there like no electronic base beat has been able to in a long time.

Playing the game...

2011-09-08T00:10:00.000-07:00

I'm so bad at it.
Even when I try and play it out in my mind, I end up laying all my cards on the table.
I knew there was a reason I always lost at Snakes & Ladders.

Sometimes I still need you

2011-09-07T02:52:00.000-07:00

I wonder if the heart ever does stop needing someone you've shared it with?... Eish.

Dip with me

2011-09-06T09:12:00.000-07:00

Unfading style

2011-08-31T12:51:00.000-07:00

Aunty Gouwa and Uncle Ismail - the most stylish couple of my year...

Happy Birthday to meeeee!

2011-08-30T03:55:00.001-07:00

The Qur'an - translation by Tarif Khalidi

2011-08-29T11:49:00.000-07:00

"The repeated invitation to mankind to exercise their reason is as timeless, universal, and imperative as anything else in the Qur'anic text itself."

2011-08-28T02:57:00.000-07:00

From here.

Zambia

2011-08-24T02:14:00.000-07:00

For the past ten days I stayed in Lusaka, the capital of Zambia, helping manage and facilitate youth during a five day Zambian Children's Climate Conference.

It was an intense couple of days, but what overshadowed the chaotic logistics was the warm, intelligent spirits of Zambian people, especially the youth. If I ever have babies I'm rasin' them in Zambia!

At the end of the conference youth from the nine provinces of Zambia had to present how they would combat HIV and Aids and climate change when they headed home.

One group from Kitwe in the Copperbelt produced this song – the beat baby, the beat!

ZCCC3: "Reduce recycle reuse" a song to move you by childrensradiofoundation

"It was only after her thoughts grew wings that sadness became less flatering."

2011-08-09T11:57:00.001-07:00

London's burning... again

2011-08-09T06:55:00.000-07:00

And it's no surprise that it's happening in 2011.

"It's not one occasional attack on dignity, it's a repeated humiliation, being continuously dispossessed in a society rich with possession. Young, intelligent citizens of the ghetto seek an explanation for why they are at the receiving end of bleak Britain, condemned to a darkness where their humanity is not even valued enough to be helped. Savagery is a possibility within us all. Some of us have been lucky enough not to have to call upon it for survival; others, exhausted from failure, can justify resorting to it."

- "Caring costs – but so do riots", by Camila Batmanghelidjh

The festering had gone on so long, that even as an outsider who only lived in the UK for two years, the stench was inescapable.

My day with Madeleine Peyroux

2011-08-01T05:20:00.000-07:00

Mmmmm...

Listen

Goodbye Amy Winehouse

2011-07-24T00:39:00.001-07:00

Amy: Is that alright?

Rest In Peace.

How to let go?

2011-07-23T14:56:00.000-07:00

Edel Rodriguez

My bread and butter

2011-07-23T14:22:00.000-07:00

I work for an amazing NGO, Children's Radio Foundation. If you haven't heard of it, it's time you do! Never before have I been so content with how I butter my daily bread. I am truely blessed.

We produce a weekly podcast, which you can check out on SoundCloud or download for free on iTunes.

This week was all about the music...

Radio Workshop: South African musicians share their talents by childrensradiofoundation

Noritake

2011-07-23T11:20:00.000-07:00

I'm having a love affair... The Noritake kind. (They've even done Ghibli themed crockery!)

From here.

Fever Ray

2011-07-10T11:13:00.000-07:00

Emirates, I love you for your selection of world cinema

2011-07-08T15:16:00.000-07:00

When I'm flying I feel like I'm in a time warp bubble - everything stops for a couple of hours. I feel like I'm literally just hanging in a moment. I can't get enough of it. And well I also rejoice in being able to watch world cinema until my eyes are itchy and red.

These were my favourites this past journey.

1,778 Stories of Me and My Wife

Guan yin shan

Raiou

BP Portrait Award 2011

2011-06-23T09:54:00.000-07:00

There were quite a few portraits that made me stand still, but for reasons I can't explain this portrait – 'Latoya' by Alan Coulson – made me stand still for a little bit longer.

BP Portrait Awards 2011

Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind

2011-06-22T04:00:00.000-07:00

I've found another Ghibli masterpiece by Hayao Miyazaki...

The Serpentine Dance

2011-06-21T14:29:00.000-07:00

As I walked through the Barbican's 'Watch Me Move' animation exhibition, travelling from the beginning to the current world of animation, I found myself mesmerised by this...

The Serpentine Dance - Lumière Brothers (1899)

I'm heading to London

2011-06-08T14:21:00.000-07:00

In a weeks time, to be exact, I will be on a plane making my way to London.

A visit I am getting quite excited about!

From here.

It's no coincidence...

2011-06-08T13:56:00.000-07:00

That the name of Lamb's new album is my favourite number...

Mini-documentary about the making of the new album 5 from lamb-official on Vimeo.

Tootsie Roll Pop

2011-05-30T05:32:00.000-07:00

One of the many benefits of having an American intern... discovering my new obsession!

Frome here.

From here.

And she was a beautiful bride...

2011-05-28T11:47:00.000-07:00

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy

2011-05-25T13:25:00.000-07:00

Today someone entered my life, and will forever be a part of it. Welcome to our world Wild Thing.

TAQWACORE

2011-05-19T13:32:00.000-07:00

Watch it. Read it. The birth of PUNK ISLAM.

I voted.

2011-05-19T13:26:00.000-07:00

Citizen 1: "Joh, the line is long!"
Citizen 2: "Well we had to wait until 1994 to vote, so this isn't long at all."

Caption and image by Kent Lingeveldt:

"WOW, this seems like so long ago. Surviving political graffiti in Mitchells Plain from the early 90's. No matter what, I AM DAMN PROUD ABOUT HOW FAR WE HAVE COME AS A NATION!"

Ubuntu Bethu

2011-05-15T10:32:00.000-07:00

This weekend I fell in love with the realism of Gerald Tabata and Lindile Magunya's art.

What's the personality of your city?

2011-05-14T10:33:00.000-07:00

All my senses are loving Radiolab...

Blank

2011-05-09T05:43:00.000-07:00

Feeling like I need to be filled in...

Hit me up

2011-05-06T07:29:00.000-07:00

Boy: Hi

Girl: Hi

Boy: Are you from Cape Town?

Girl: Ja, born and bred.

Boy: But you look Asian?

Girl: Well, I have Malaysian or something in me...

Boy: Wow, where in Malaysia are you from?

Girl: Um, I have no idea hey, I'm talking about the slave trade days...

Boy: You see, you're like me, I'm white, but I also don't know where I'm from!

Girl: [Smiles.]

Blessed by Vusi Mahlasela

2011-04-30T15:05:00.000-07:00

Tonight I don't feel like I just came back from a mind-blowing gig. I feel like I've been lead through my country's suffering, hope, passion, love, and above all its amazing ability to forgive. Vusi Mahlasela's voice and music doesn't need to make your limbs swing and your head bop because it stills you and lets your spirit sway.

In the words of Vusi Mahlasela, "Just because you have blood all around you, why should you stop singing love songs?"

PS D-Seven – you should be the PS on all musical letters ;)

Racist Stereotyping in the English Language by Robert B. Moore

2011-04-28T02:20:00.000-07:00

Some may blackly (angrily) accuse me of trying to blacken (defame) the English language, to give it a black eye (a mark of shame) by writing such black words (hostile).
They may denigrate (to cast aspersions; to darken) me by accusing me of being blackhearted (malevolent), of having a black outlook (pessimistic, dismal) on life, of being a blackguard (scoundrel) - which would certainly be a black mark (detrimental fact) against me.
Some may black-brow (scowl at) me and hope that a black cat crosses in front of me because of this black deed. I may become a black sheep (one who causes shame or embarrassment because of deviation from accepted standards), who will be blackballed (ostracized) by being placed on a blacklist (list of undesireables) in an attempt to blackmail (to force or coerce into a particular action) me to retract my words.
By attempts to blackjack (to compel by threat) me will have a Chinaman’s chance of success, for I am not a yellow-bellied Indian-giver of words, who will white-wash (cover up or gloss over vices or crimes) a black lie (harmful, inexcusable). I challenge the purity an innocence (white) of the English language. I don’t see things in black and white (entirely bad or entirely good) terms, for I am a white man (marked by upright firmness) is there ever was one.
However, it would be a black day when I would not “call a spade a spade,” even though some will suggest a white man calling the English language racist is like the pot calling the kettle black. While many may be niggardly (grudging, scanty) in their support, others will be honest and decent - and to them I say, that’s very white of you.

via デイジかわいい

Russo

2011-04-25T15:17:00.003-07:00

2011-03-29T15:33:00.000-07:00

"Fashion is not something that exists in dresses only. Fashion is in the sky, in the street, fashion has to do with ideas, the way we live, what is happening."
- Coco Chanel

From here.

Since having moved back from London, I've realised that fashion in Cape Town is not how Coco Chanel describes it. I may have 'just-returned-from-a-first-world-country' goggles on, but I personally don't feel fashion in Cape Town reflects 'the way we live' and 'what is happening' for all Cape Townians. The fashion 'scene' is selective here (compared to my experience in the UK), and the crowd severely lacking diversity. I feel it doesn't allow for everyone to be a part of it.

Then again, fashion in South Africa is an always changing and developing environment, so hopefully I have these 'said' goggles on, I guess time will tell...

A new chapter

2011-03-03T23:42:00.000-08:00

I've left London.

It's a blue-skyed day in Cape Town and I miss every tingle that my body felt when I stepped out into the cold, grey British morning...

Life never ceases to surprise you.

Weddings

2011-01-11T17:06:00.001-08:00

Pure joy for the spirit.

2011-01-10T14:51:00.000-08:00

And so I carry on...

From here.

2011

2011-01-01T12:56:00.000-08:00

Image by Karl Lilje

'Count through the thorns of this year, and line up the petals for next. What it amounts to, sweet rose, is that this ‘twas as good as the next.' - Elsibe Loubser McGuffog

Tokyo Sonata

2010-12-27T15:46:00.000-08:00

A beautiful movie, with a beautiful ending...

Debussy, Clair de lune played by the character Kenji Sasaki in Tokyo Sonata.

The undercut

2010-12-16T13:41:00.000-08:00

See, no matter all the clichés, when I go through change I feel the need to cut my hair and I'm sure it's the same for a lot of other people too.

The problem is when you want an undercut at the same time as a job...

Oval Tube Station

2010-12-16T13:30:00.000-08:00

I didn't know it was possible to have a favourite tube station, but actually it is, and mine is Oval.

Not only do they have a 'Thought for the day', but they also play classical music. It doesn't get much better than that.

Warning: Current Rihanna crush

2010-12-06T15:20:00.000-08:00

Why? Well, I don't bladdy know! I just am. Seriously thinking of purchasing a bright-red lace front weave. No jokes.

Getting into the Christmas spirit

2010-12-06T15:08:00.000-08:00

Dotori

2010-12-02T11:09:00.000-08:00

Besides the amazing food and the most polite and kind staff, Dotori gets me every time with their two clay South Korean dolls – a bride and groom. They look up at me and say, "Kiss me, kiss me!"

What am I going to do when I move back to South Africa, I'll never see those cute faces again, and where will I find yummy-deep-fried-drenched-in-the-most-amazing sweet-chili-sauce chicken?

And then it snowed

2010-11-30T12:07:00.000-08:00

The first snowfall in London this morning, made for a rather giddy walk to work!

Watch this heart fall apart

2010-11-30T04:22:00.000-08:00

What is worse - watching hearts fall apart or having your
own disintegrate?

I found it here.

Drawing

2010-11-28T03:14:00.000-08:00

I'm slowly starting to stop daydreaming about being an illustrator and have started drawing.

I've been attending a short course that teaches you the raw basics, with all the classic, old skool elements of drawing.

This image is of one of my tonal drawings. Baby steps, hopefully I'll be putting my imagination on paper soon - and not only with words!

The Stench of Injustice

2010-11-27T11:11:00.000-08:00

"It is late afternoon and the Kenyan sun has begun to harden a toxic mixture of mud and faeces, mapping out makeshift roads and alleyways between corrugated iron shacks. Over one million people weave through Kibera, Africa’s largest slum that hugs the fringes of Nairobi’s elite suburbs – children play with plastic bags filled with human excrement, and men and women sell vegetables held in cardboard boxes that seep up the slime beneath. The overpowering stench of faeces is a constant reminder that sanitation is nearly non-existent in Kibera, a public disaster that Focusing Resources on Effective School Health states has lead to over 400 million school-aged children being infected with multiple worm species..."

For those who were interested in reading the full article I entered into The Guardian International Development Journalism Competition 2010 download here.

If a tree falls in a forest...

2010-11-26T09:57:00.000-08:00

After being shortlisted for the Guardian International Development Journalism Competition 2010 I thought I had finally proven myself as a worthy writer in the UK. But as swift as the feeling of success came, so did the deep disappointment and lack of confidence when my article was revoked. I was wrongly advised by Guardian staff as to which category I should enter and they felt the only 'fair' solution was to remove any trace of my entry.

The saying, "If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" has played on my mind ever since. Some say I should feel proud just in the knowledge that I was chosen out of hundreds of entries, but what does it matter when it doesn't really exist?

Ah well, and so we pick up and carry on...

Winter

2010-11-21T14:07:00.000-08:00

Sore throat. Numb toes. Morning groans... Winter.

Out of the woodwork

2010-11-16T14:50:00.000-08:00

I've been away for a while, due to a writing-knock. Almost healed... been a few places in the past three months.

Stockholm

Edinbrugh

Berlin

Barcelona

Identity theft

2010-09-21T13:48:00.000-07:00

It seems only white people are victims of identity theft in the UK, hmmm.

The man

2010-09-21T13:44:00.000-07:00

There was a lovely man waiting outside my house for me...

Playing for change...

2010-09-13T14:04:00.000-07:00

is playing with my heart strings, it's this cheesy but true stuff that gets to me the most!

Help Connect the World Through Music from Doug Kenney on Vimeo.

Playing for change

Miss Potter

2010-09-12T16:07:00.000-07:00

I am left with a light smile on my lips, and a tear and snot stained pajamas after watching Miss Potter... Feeling slight regret that I gave away my full edition of Beatrix Potter books; but I can see why it would have been so easy for a six year old to share.

It's so hard to say goodbye

2010-08-01T11:57:00.000-07:00

I loved them from the moment I laid eyes on them seven (!) years ago, so you can understand why I am struggling to say goodbye. I've attempted cutting all ties several times, but a black bag just seems such a horrible way to go... So I've decided to keep them snug in my room, yes sometimes they get in the way or I tramp on them, but at least they know they are still a apart of my life. Or rather, at least I feel like they are still a part of mine.

Lovebox

2010-07-18T16:25:00.000-07:00

Think: your electoronica wet dream coming true...

Peaches blew my mind, broken leg and all she stole our hearts; and well the boys and girls (or should I say the ladies and girls) of Hercules & Love Affair got my feet tapping and my hands clapping... and then there was Chromeo, sigh, oh my "Tenderoni".

Happy birthday Madiba!

2010-07-18T15:30:00.000-07:00

92 years old today. Madiba day – my mother proudly told me how happy she was that she could be a part of the celebrations, "Algamdulilaah, Madiba can peacefully meet Our Lord knowing he strived to uplift and move our country from its dark depths of bondage. I pray that each one of us strive towards making this world a better place for our fellow creations, Ameen." Nothing like a bit of motherly preaching on a Sunday night!

Dazed & Confused

2010-07-15T12:26:00.000-07:00

Silly might be me, but it's nice to get a mention. Yes, nice. A thanks in print for your minds helping hand.

Dazed & Confused June 2010 issue focused on South Africa, six years on from their issue that celebrated ten years of Democracy in my home country.

If you squint you can see my name, right at the bottom. Check out some snippets at Dazed Digital.

2010-07-14T08:46:00.000-07:00

Today I saw an exhibition that suited my mood...

The Family and the Land: Sally Mann (18 June - 19 September at The Photographers' Gallery)

2010-07-13T16:08:00.001-07:00

Will we keep pushing and pulling until we end up holding still hearts in our hands?

2010-07-13T04:01:00.000-07:00

Learning to deal positively with dissapointment – apparently a needed life skill...

What KAK.

2010-07-07T15:50:00.001-07:00

Under the sea

2010-07-05T15:11:00.000-07:00

And so nature inspires...

Elektra - by Sophocles in a version by Anne Carson

2010-06-30T12:10:00.000-07:00

Electra And The Chorus (1795), by John Flaxman

I didn't know what to expect. No previews, no press night and free... there had to be a catch right?

As this city does so often, it taught me that theatre – at it's best – can be free.

Electra by Sophocoles is a huanting story, and Anne Carson's 'Elektra' version leaves you walking out the theatre with it's mood wrapped around you. A mixture of choreography, song, and gripping acting made me literally lean over and sit on the edge of my seat.

Young Vic in association with Headlong present, Elektra by Sophocles in a version by Anne Carson.

I seem to be collecting dolls

2010-06-15T14:09:00.000-07:00

It happened slowly, steadily, and before I knew it I became a doll collector. Still deciding whether I should consciously pursue this obsession...

Longlist

2010-06-14T16:14:00.000-07:00

I've made it onto the longlist for the Guardian International Development Journalism Competition! It's a long list, but I'm still pretty really happy about making it this far. Let's see if I make it through the cropping...

'The stench of injustice'. Don't want to read too much into it being the first on the list, but it's hard not to!

Decisions...

2010-06-14T10:29:00.000-07:00

I feel like her, every muscle hurts from looking up and thinking about which way I should go.

Illustration by Iro Tsavala

New shoes!

2010-06-10T13:01:00.000-07:00

I'm obsessed. I wear them at every opportunity, even if they pinch my toes while walking the streets of London. Swedish Hasbeens.

Summer

2010-06-10T12:50:00.000-07:00

OK, so right at this very moment it is cloudy outside. But the fact that I can sit around the flat without being wrapped in a jersey, socks and sheep skin boots is such a great taste of freedom!

Post office dreams

2010-06-10T12:32:00.000-07:00

I'm sure I'm not the only one, but I love licking stamps. I quite like the sugary-strange taste. But most of all I miss the overwhelming sense of anxiousness and anticipation that comes over you just as you drop a letter into a letterbox.

A couple of weeks ago I stumbled across a stamp expo, and right there before me where my forefathers, pictures of my beautiful country and something for my sister - the first WWF magazine cover - all on a stamp.

Rian Malan on South Africa and the World Cup

2010-05-17T15:33:00.000-07:00

"...I struggle to see how anyone can resist a country where such things happen. South Africa is amazing! At any given moment, all possible futures seem entirely plausible. We are winning, we are losing. We are progressing even as we hurtle backwards. Every day brings momentous exhilarations and dumbfounding setbacks, and the sun shines brightly even in winter. Throw in the heady proximity of Mandela and Beckham, and you're almost guaranteed a splendid time.
... There is much to be said for living on the edge, in a place shot through with "heartspace and the danger of beauty", as the Boer poet Breytenbach once phrased it. Britain seems pallid in comparison. We are told that your election was an event of epochal significance, but from Jo'burg, it looked boring – three nice white men with almost identical opinions jostling for space on the same centrist pinhead. As for the prospect of a hung parliament… you call that a crisis? Good God. We have far worse, every day, before breakfast. And we're still laughing. Better get here before we stop."

- An extract from his article in the South Africa Today series.

I'm smiling from ear to ear.

'Lara' - Lord Byron

2010-05-05T17:32:00.000-07:00

"He has told them to read 'Lara'. His notes deal with 'Lara'. There is no way in which he can evade the poem.

He reads aloud:
He stood a stranger in this breathing world,
An erring spirit from another hurled;
A thing of dark imaginings, that shaped
By choice the perils he by chance escaped.

'Who will gloss these lines for me? Who is this "erring spirit"? Why does he call himself "a thing"? From what world does he come?

'He has long ceased to be surprised at the range of ignorance of his students. Post-Christian, post historical, post literate, they might as well have been hatched from eggs yesterday. So he does not expect them to know about fallen angels or where Byron might have read of them. What he does expect is a round of good natured guesses which, with luck, he can guide toward the mark. But today he is met with silence, a dogged silence that organizes itself palpably around the stranger in their midst. They will not speak, they will not play his game, as long as a stranger is there to listen and judge and mock.

'Lucifer,' he says. 'The angel hurled out of heaven. Of how angels live we know little, but we can assume they do not require oxygen. At home Lucifer, the dark angel, does not need to breathe. All of a sudden he finds himself cast out into this strange "breathing world" of ours. "Erring": a being who chooses his own path, who lives dangerously, even creating danger for himself. Let us read further.

'The boy has not looked down once at the text. Instead, with a little smile on his lips, a smile in which there is, just possibly, a touch of bemusement, he takes in his words.

He could at times resign his own for others' good,
But not in pity, not because he ought,
But in some strange perversity of thought,
That swayed him onward with a secret pride
To do what few or none would do beside;
And this same impulse would in tempting time Mislead his spirit equally to crime.

'So, what kind of creature is this Lucifer?' By now the students must surely feel the current running between them, between himself and the boy. It is to the boy alone that the question has addressed itself; and, like a sleeper summoned to life, the boy responds. 'He does what he feels like. He doesn't care if it's good or bad. He just does it.' 'Exactly. Good or bad, he just does it. He doesn't act on principle but on impulse, and the source of his impulses is dark to him. Read a few lines further:

"His madness was not of the head, but heart."

A mad heart. What is a mad heart?'"

From the book 'Disgrace' by J.m Coetzee (1999)

I think this extract expresses a lot of what the core of the novel expresses on both a political and personal level – the raging desire, the mad hearts...

Disgrace

2010-05-05T17:19:00.000-07:00

Tonight I watched the film adaptation of J.M Coetzee's book 'Disgrace' at the BFI South Bank South African Cinema.

My thoughts are running riot...

The uniformed stereotypes of my country reaffirmed

The weight generations pass on – white guilt, unspoken oppression, relentless injustice

The ugliness of desire, yet the truth it expresses of human behaviour

The beauty of South Africa's landscape

The ability of the spirit to carry on, to still love

The wounds, so many, that still need to be healed

The talent we have, the talent we should embrace and celebrate

Change

2010-05-04T11:58:00.000-07:00

from here

It's about to happen

Broken chains

Mending flames

Breath in new air

Breath out the stale

Embrace the change

Something new has come again

This is the devine I'm in search of...

2010-04-29T16:57:00.001-07:00

I Have Learned So Much

I
Have
Learned
So much from God
That I can no longer
Call
Myself

A Christian, a Hindu, a Muslim,
A Buddhist, a Jew.

The Truth has shared so much of Itself
With me

That I can no longer call myself
A man, a woman, an angel,
Or even pure
Soul.

Love has
Befriended Hafiz so completely
It has turned to ash
And freed
Me

Of every concept and image
My mind has ever known.

- Hafiz, from "The Gift"

When Smoke Gets In Your Eyes

'Niceness as a scalpel'

But ja, maybe he isn't neh. "Nothing special about this." Circles.

Finding new highs

Joh. Now that is wack.

I'm suppose to be on a laptop sabatical

My Zambian tune

Murmuration

I've been away...

Hearts aren't made for boxes. So what the fuck is your's doing in one?

Japanese cloisonné

Hans Borres

'the dance' - by Toni Stuart

chase [cheys] verb, chased, chas·ing, noun

It's always better to look out the window

Afrikaaps

Feel that beat

Playing the game...

Sometimes I still need you

Dip with me

Unfading style

Happy Birthday to meeeee!

The Qur'an - translation by Tarif Khalidi

Zambia

"It was only after her thoughts grew wings that sadness became less flatering."

London's burning... again

My day with Madeleine Peyroux

Goodbye Amy Winehouse

How to let go?

My bread and butter

Noritake

Fever Ray

Emirates, I love you for your selection of world cinema

BP Portrait Award 2011

Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind

The Serpentine Dance

I'm heading to London

It's no coincidence...

Tootsie Roll Pop

And she was a beautiful bride...

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy

TAQWACORE

I voted.

Citizen 1: "Joh, the line is long!"Citizen 2: "Well we had to wait until 1994 to vote, so this isn't long at all."

Ubuntu Bethu

What's the personality of your city?

Blank

Hit me up

Blessed by Vusi Mahlasela

Racist Stereotyping in the English Language by Robert B. Moore

Russo

A new chapter

Weddings

2011

'Count through the thorns of this year, and line up the petals for next. What it amounts to, sweet rose, is that this ‘twas as good as the next.' - Elsibe Loubser McGuffog

Tokyo Sonata

The undercut

Oval Tube Station

Warning: Current Rihanna crush

Getting into the Christmas spirit

Dotori

And then it snowed

Watch this heart fall apart

Drawing

The Stench of Injustice

If a tree falls in a forest...

Winter

Out of the woodwork

Identity theft

The man

Playing for change...

Miss Potter

It's so hard to say goodbye

Lovebox

Happy birthday Madiba!

Dazed & Confused

What KAK.

Under the sea

Elektra - by Sophocles in a version by Anne Carson

I seem to be collecting dolls

Citizen 1: "Joh, the line is long!"
Citizen 2: "Well we had to wait until 1994 to vote, so this isn't long at all."